Big Hairline News

I was standing in the hallway waiting for the elevator at the conference I was attending when I noticed the Headline News “Big Headline News” feature on the TV in the hallway.  It wasn’t bad news about a new terrorist attack or political coup.  It wasn’t good news about a successful organ transplant or reunited family members.  It was non-news.  It was about Justin Bieber’s new stinking haircut!  With all that’s going on in the world, our professional news media apparently believe that the haircut of one teenager merits “Big Headline” status.  Hairline?  Yes.  Headline? NO!

GET A GRIP, SCOOPS!

I’ve got nothing against Justin Bieber, except that his music seems to have a hip hop or R&B flavor to it.  (I hate hip hop and R&B.)  I’ve even forgiven him for being Canadian.  He seems like a nice guy.  He has a good voice, and his new haircut works.  Good for him!  But, is it major news?

Hardly.

I think it’s time to clean up the gene pool, so to speak, of the news media establishment.  We’re not going to get good, reliable news as long as they keep producing more reporters who gab about haircuts and Hollywood nuts rather than real news.

Maybe we should add a new hunting season to our game and wildlife agencies’ lists.  I think we should have open season on media hacks during election seasons; during Hollywood and music awards; and as needed during hurricanes, floods, earthquakes, tsunamis, celebrity crime sprees, and all those other times when they just won’t shut up!

Don’t worry.  I’m not completely merciless.  Why, we could begin with simple, entertaining public beatings.  Pack up a picnic lunch and take the ol’ family out to the weekly “Smack-a-Hack Public Beating and Family Fair.”  If that doesn’t improve media quality, then we could switch to waterboarding and other humane methods before finally putting them down.  I mean, they are people after all.

Beatings for better blurbs?  Yes, that sounds like good news to me!

[In the event that some reporter does get beaten to a bloody and possibly lifeless pulp, let it be known that this author is not condoning real and satisfying physical violence against those who report worthless news.

No matter how much they deserve it.]

.end.

Published in: on 2011/02/22 at 6:47 pm  Leave a Comment  
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A Sinless Renegade?

I heard Alistair Begg on the radio Sunday. I was not familiar with him; I don’t think I’ve ever heard him before. He was preaching on the story of the blind man who was interrogated by the Pharisees because Jesus had healed him on the Sabbath (John 9:13-23). I loved this portion of his sermon:

“Of course, Jesus kept the Sabbath. He kept the Law in its perfection; Jesus was sinless. In fact, Calvin suggests that Jesus performed these miracles purposefully, deliberately, on the Sabbath. I kinda like that idea! …

“‘Hey, Jesus, don’t You know it’s the Sabbath?’

“‘Of course, I know it’s the Sabbath. Watch this!’”

Jesus, a renegade? No, no, no, … OH, YES!

Go ahead. Defy tradition. It’s biblical.

.end.

Published in: on 2010/07/21 at 10:09 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Swallowing Camels and Straining at Gnats

In the Independent Fundamental Baptist movement, it seems that some — perhaps, well-intentioned — individuals have so wanted others to be godly that the well-intentioned ones have attempted to “legislate” godliness.  Paul the apostle said that the Law does not save, but that it functions as a teacher to show us our need of a savior.  The Law illumines; the Savior saves.  To paraphrase a former pastor whom I greatly respect: “We think if we make kids do right, they will love God; but if we can get them to love God, then they will do right.”  Should we encourage kids to do right?  Yes.  But, ultimately, they need to know God and love Him.  “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.” – John 14:15 NASB.

It seems to me that the nit-picking IFBers (not all IFBers, just the nit-pickers) have become the Pharisees of today.  Just as the ancient Jewish lawyers made law upon minute law to keep from breaking God’s laws, the IFBers have done the same.  A good illustration is the old analogy of building a fence far enough away from the edge of a cliff so, if someone does climb over the fence, then at least he won’t fall over the edge without further stupidity on his part.  It’s the idea of a sin buffer: it’s better to break a rule than to break God’s Law.  But, the buffer wasn’t there to begin with.  It wasn’t established by God.  It’s tradition, not doctrine.

Think about how IFBers revile movie theaters. “You shouldn’t go to the movies because the theaters show wicked movies. Even if you’re going to see a clean movie, those watching you go into the theater don’t know that you’re not going to see that dirty R-rated movie. You’re putting your testimony at risk. And, even if you’re there to see a good wholesome movie, your money is paying for the next dirty movie they’re going to show. So don’t go to movies.”

But, don’t some of those same IFBers allow their kids to go the movie rental store where many, many more dirty movies are at their fingertips?  And, who knows that they’re not in there to pick up one of the numerous filthy films?  Hmm?  No one.  Aren’t they jeopardizing their testimony as much that way as they would be by going to a theater?  The real sin is not in the location of the media but in the content of the media.  Sinful content is sinful whether it’s on a big screen in a popcorn-scented theater or on the flat screen in your living room.  And, do you know what?  Wholesome content is still wholesome in those same locations.

So, where did the IFBers beef with theaters come from?  According to the pastor I mentioned above, apparently, some kids years ago were fooling around in a theater (yes, “that” kind of fooling around).  So, to prevent other hormonally hopped-up teens from prematurely experiencing the bliss of anatomical compatibility in a dimly lit and parentless room, it was decided that theaters should be off limits.  Thus, a knee-jerk reaction to promiscuity transformed into a tradition, which is nearly deemed doctrine in some circles.

Dear IFBers, instead of making up new rules and obsessing over them and making sure kids keep the jot and tittle of traditions (not doctrine, but traditions of men), why not show us God?  Amaze us with the Almighty.  Don’t make us march in martial lockstep to a contrived checklist.  Instead, focus us on the Father; surprise us with the Son.  Help us behold His attributes and glory.  If the story of Isaiah is any example (Is. 6), then beholding God in His glory will cause us to change.  I beg Christian colleges and schools and IFB churches not to set the traditions of men between us and God.  Please don’t be stumbling blocks to us.

There seems to be a trend now of young people leaving fundamentalism.  In fact, I hesitate now to call myself a fundamentalist although I still agree with the fundamentals of the Christian faith: the inerrancy of the Bible, the existence of the Trinity, the deity of Jesus, and salvation that is by grace and not by works.  I don’t disagree with the fundamentals; I disagree with the Christian “Talmud” of mandated minutiae embraced by IFB churches and schools.

I wonder if the reason young adults are leaving fundamentalism is because they are now adults who can think for themselves and have come to see some of the IFB traditions (not doctrines, but man-made traditions) as ridiculous, or worse, hypocritical.

Think about such things as the theater taboo, the “scandal” — GASP! — of women wearing something other than dresses to church, the “tragedy” of hair-covered ears on males, and so on.  Ridiculous, isn’t it, what we obsess over?

Why are young adults leaving fundamentalism? Maybe it’s the modern order of Pharisaism that’s driving them away.

.end.

NC Senate Candidate Bordeaux Makes a Racist Statement

I heard this knucklehead speak at the April 13, 2010, NAACP Candidate Forum in Rocky Mount, N.C.  He seems to think that it’s not right for a white man to represent the minorities of District 3, which he claims was gerrymandered for minorities.  (He seems not to have an issue with gerrymandering either, but that’s a whole other discussion.)

Does this nut think there are only minorities and no whites in his district?  Is his plan to represent only minorities and to ignore the white population?  Why is it wrong for a white to represents blacks, but right for a black to represent whites?

It seems he’s not only a racist but a hypocrite, too!

.end.

My Former High School Teacher Is Running for the N.C. House

Jeff Collins of Rocky Mount, N.C., is running for the N.C. House seat for District 25.  He is unchallenged in the Republican primary and seeks to unseat incumbent Democrat Randy Stewart on November 2.  Collins is a conservative who longs to see our nation return to its constitutional roots, valuing individual liberty and responsibility and believing in a limited government.

Mr. Collins was one of my favorite high school teachers.  God has given him a brilliant, analytical mind and a strong grasp of a diverse array of subjects.  Under his instruction, I learned physical education, algebra/pre-calculus, journalism, Spanish, and chemistry.  He treated his students with respect while maintaining classroom discipline, and he has earned my highest regard.  If there is anyone I would send to the state House, U.S. House, or White House without any reservation or question of character, it is Jeff Collins.

District 25 citizens, visit the Jeff Collins for NC House page on Facebook to learn more.  And, don’t forget to vote for the most constitutionally conservative candidates in the N.C. primary on May 4 and in the general election on November 2.

God has blessed America throughout her history.  May we remember, repent, and return to Him!

.end.

I’m a Hater

I’m a hater.

I hate the big networks.  I hate their loud, obnoxious commercials telling me to watch the Grammys, the Emmys, the big whatever to-do featuring the latest big yahoo.  I hate their brain-rot, Hollywood-gossip shows that assume I simply adore movie or music star X who is in trouble with the law, cheating on his/her spouse, or fighting drug and/or alcohol addiction again.  I hate being told that I have to hug a tree, believe Al Gore, worship Barack Obama, and hate America.  I hate hearing the annoying yelling of Chris Matthews and car salesmen with $1,000 down and $1,500 in factory rebates.  I hate the persistent alarmist tone of news anchors and their sound of forced concern over some non-issue or some star of dubious celebrity.  I hate being lied to, swindled, and robbed by the three-ring circus of fools in the White House, the Senate, and the House of Representatives.

I hate some things because of personal preferences, and others because of the absolute principles of right and wrong.  Hatred isn’t a completely evil attribute.  When directed at the appropriate object, hatred is a very positive thing.  Hating evil, hating lies, hating murder, hating oppression: these are all perfectly valid, positive hatreds.  So, even though I hate loud television and the sickening vanity of Hollywood and its hangers-on, I respect the right of others to enjoy them.

But, when you steal from me and call it a tax; when you give my taxes to “bail out” failures; when you and your sodomite Senate buddy swindle the economy into the ground; when you seek to strip away my rights protected under the Constitution; when you grant those rights to war criminals and call it justice, then you have aligned yourself with the things I and all other people of ethics hate.  So, when we fight for our freedoms; when we smite your false justice with real justice; when we stand and say, “NO MORE!”, then, when you get burned, don’t be hatin’ on us!  ‘Kay?

I’m a hater, and you know what?  I’m cool with that.

.end.

Published in: on 2010/01/31 at 3:08 am  Leave a Comment  
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Revenge of the Blue Space Indians Against the Wicked White People – 3D!

Just got back from watching “Revenge of the Blue Space Indians Against the Wicked White People – 3D.” You’ve probably heard it called “Avatar 3D.”

Entertaining action and graphics; however, I’m not into the whole “human = unenlightened, nature-raping brute” craze. If you are, then you’d probably love the story line. And, there’s this added bonus: apparently, being a Marine just isn’t honorable anymore.

Another delightful feature is that most of the human characters could have used an Ivory-soap sandwich. You know, I always appreciate gratuitous foul language. If there is one thing that ruins a good ol’ picture show, it’s the absence of a healthy dose of colorful cuss words and inappropriate invocations for a deity to smite someone or something with eternal condemnation.

If you decide to watch “Avatar,” be sure to see it in 3D so you, too, can enjoy the optical benefits of trying to watch a movie through excessive auto glass tint. At least, that’s what it was like for me. Maybe it had something to do with my contact lenses and the polarization of the glasses; I’m not sure. But, 3D hardly seems worth the extra $2 on the ticket price. It was like looking through a dark View Master; and, frankly, the 3D in a View Master is a lot better.

All that being said, I did enjoy the movie in a general sense, but not enough to try to get a group of friends together to go see it. Rather, I’m looking forward to M. Night Shyamalan’s upcoming take on Nickelodeon’s “Avatar: the Last Air Bender.” Hopefully, little Aang the Air Bender won’t be blowing hot air.

.end.

Published in: on 2009/12/27 at 6:12 am  Leave a Comment  
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Beards!

I recently traveled to Maryland for EuroQuest, a gaming convention centered around strategy boardgames, sometimes called “eurogames.”  While there, I noticed a peculiar facial phenomenon…

Published in: on 2009/11/18 at 11:17 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Powered Amplification, Powered Annoyance

I guess some people just get caught up with their hobby-related gadgets.  Why else would musicians use powered amps and speakers in the intimate venue of a small coffee shop?  Are their voices and instruments so weak that they really need the electronic enhancement?

No, they probably feel cool getting there early, lugging in their big, plastic cases, unpacking those complicated-looking mixing boards, unwinding and hooking up those thick and heavy cables.

“Yeah, man, I’m a musician.  I gotta hook up my rig for my gig.  Gotta get those sweet sounds bouncin’ around like a hyperactive toddler on a Kool-Aid binge.”

Uh, yeah.  About those “sweet sounds,” some of them — and, in really bad cases, many of them — are downright sour.  And, playing them louder?  It doesn’t make them better.  No, my friend, it does not.  If your ears were “the boys,” then a powered sour note would be the foot to the groin.

Coffee-shop musicians, protect our delicate ears, and CAN THE AMPS!

.end.

Published in: on 2009/03/07 at 12:09 am  Leave a Comment  
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Obama Cuts off Babies’ Heads

“The President cuts off babies’ heads while they’re still in their mommies’ tummies.”

That’s how my coworker’s five-year-old described partial-birth abortion to someone at his school.

He overheard his mom telling his sister that she didn’t like Obama because of his position on partial-birth abortion. His sister asked what partial-birth abortion was, and her mom said the baby’s head is opened up and his brains are sucked out. The little boy interpreted this exchange as the President cutting off babies’ heads while they’re still in their mommies’ tummies.

The sad thing is the kid’s not far from the truth.

.end.

Published in: on 2009/02/25 at 1:28 am  Leave a Comment  
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